You may begin to wonder as you peruse our Photo Gallery: "Who are these strange and fascinating people?" Let us take a moment, gentle browser, to answer that very question--

Or, if you want to be that way, you can go directly to the Photo Gallery. But, mark our words, you'll be a compass-less wreck if you do.

WARNING: Don't believe everything you read.

Dramatis Personae
Ron Ronald Maxwell
a.k.a. Leah's Daddy-O
Sign: Capricorn
Ron "Gastrolicious" Maxwell enjoys baking soda, potato chips, and spending quality time with his Garden Claw.
Bob Robert Wilcox
a.k.a. Curtis's Paterfamilias
Sign: Cancer
Bob "Boomerang" Wilcox is fond of ESPN, ESPN Classic, ESPN On Demand, ESPN.com, and hanging Christmas lights.
Cathy Cathy Maxwell
a.k.a. Leah's Big Momma
Sign: Sagittarius
Cathy "Crikey" Maxwell collects doorknobs, refrigerator magnets, empty cigarette cartons, and anything fuchsia.
Sandy Sandy Wilcox
a.k.a. Curtis's Mum
Sign: Libra
Sandy "Schoolhouse Rock" Wilcox adores the proper use of apostrophes, thank you notes, and all things smelted.
Ian Ian Maxwell
a.k.a. Leah's Lil Bro
Sign: Taurus
Ian "Cookie Monster" Maxwell's favorite pastimes are grunting, shrugging, shirking, and whittling.
Scott Scott Wilcox
a.k.a. Curtis's Le Petit Frère
Sign: Sagittarius
Scott "Broadway Joe" Wilcox gets a kick out of sharpened no. 2 pencils, white chocolate, and playing the Bay City Rollers hit "Saturday Night" on his air guitar.
Lavina Lavina Carpenter
a.k.a. Leah's Bubbie
Sign: Sagittarius
"Luscious" Lavina Carpenter likes her tea hot, her television loud, and her men feisty.
Sheila Sheila Wilcox
a.k.a. Scott "Broadway Joe" Wilcox's Lawful Squeeze
Sign: Pisces
In honor of Sheila "Spicy" Wilcox's passion for haiku:
Bob Wilcox once said
Please eat the chicken salad
I made it for you
Chip Chip Presutti
a.k.a. The Officiant
Because Chip "Emcee" Presutti is not family, we feel it would be imprudent to describe in detail his love of soy products.
Coupplotter Coupplotter
a.k.a. Tuna Helper
Sign: Gemini
Coupplotter's turn ons included bare toes, unguarded furniture, and playing that funky music. (Coupplotter passed away on June 24, 2004. Rest in peace, our beloved dictator.)
What Did They Say ?

What DID they say (or do) when we told them we were getting married? Here's a taste!

Ron Maxwell: "[On the phone.] That's great. Here's your mother."

Cathy Maxwell: "Am I invited?"

Ian Maxwell: "[Grunt.]"

Sandy Wilcox: "[Swoon.]"

Scott Wilcox: "Well, all right!"

Bob Wilcox: "Why?"